thats great to help her celebrate her birthday, especially saw her recieve the present with full happiness, so scare she don like it, hahahaha! but too bad, her frens asking her go out to celebrate…planned celebrate with her, but nvm la, even is short time but she oso try hard to fix the time for me to celebrate with her….hahaha, enough la liked this, as long as she happy! happy birthday my love, muaks!
I am lost… Lost on what i need to do… Looking on your sad face,saying with hopeful that he will remember the date of your birthday… The atmosphere and the feeling I have really so strange and weird. Angry? Sad? Disappointed? Whatever, that’s not important at all… But why? everytime I want to help but never get a chance… But even get the chance will I willing to do so? That’s so ironic… From the begining already realise that once he take an action, even a simple greeting, you will more admire on him… But when starring at your face full-fill with sadness and hope, I really lost on myself for helping you or not… everytime lie on myself ask you try to find him or give me his contact number, sometime really so regret saying about these…But I don’t want u feel yourself bad….Am I stupid? Hehe…yeah, I realise I am… Helping the one I love most spread her feeling on the one I dislike… That’s so ironic thing… After lost the things humans only can realise how important it is… Everything really not same as what human expect, the one admire don’t like own but only the one don’t like always stay besides… Is the fact of world? Or just only I am too sensitive thinking on this stuff… Maybe I am the one who really need to disappear, or I am just only a nonsense living being…
birthday, should be spent the happiness with the one who close n friends, but y…is that only this date can be happy only? after happy, only can be sad? i really don understand… birthday, really become no meaning for me… the happiness just only a flash of light, after that fall into the darkness… i really so sad… y??? everything actually is fine, but y? is this the one u really wan? is that i only bring u suffer? i really so sad…heard ur crying sounds, saying don wan to involve in love…is that i only a nonsense being? i just only a rubbish? wat i can do? protecting u is that wrong? i really feel pain to looking u suffer, y don u take me as ur listner? just awhile i already feel enough… ya i admit, i really so wish u can accept me, n i often dream that our future life, when u r saying about that boy i really feel jealous. a girl as good liked u but he never care u, when u r talking about him, i really not dare to look on ur face…i really scare, i scare i’ll lost u, scare i cant accept the one i love the most will gone, the one i love not love me but others…i really scare to suffer this again. Y? wat’s wrong i did? sometime i really so tired to be alive, when i know ur heart actually not with me…but y? i was blur on wat i m thinking… love u just only make u suffer, but can’t put down the love…. i really so confuse…y……
